SoulTraveler

This week my knitting group is going to knit at one downtown location and afterwards go to another downtown locale to enjoy some adult libations. It promises to be a fun evening. The problem is that I will have to park in one location and walk through town in order to get from one place to another. One of the gals mentioned garage parking which brought forth a huge fear for mine and that is, parking in an enclosed public garage alone. I pride myself on being pretty fearless on most things but this is an exception. I could simply skip the whole evening and not have to give it another thought or I can face my fear head on. Or perhaps there is another way to reach the destination and avoid the garage. The big question here is whether I am going to let my fear keep me from a nice evening or can I perhaps come up with a solution? I've decided I will find street parking and walk along the streets which is a better alternative for me. It won't be entirely comfortable when I have to wa

The key to any successful relationship whether it be romance oriented or not, is to honor yourself. By honoring yourself you set a standard of behavior that is acceptable to you and will allow for healthy growth to take place between two people. Often times, people set separate standards for what they will tolerate in a relationship versus a friendship. Some people set higher standards for a romantic partner than they do for a friend, others do the opposite. Standards for ANY relationship that you engage in should be the same. All relationships are about give and take and require a fairly equal exchange of effort. I say fairly because sometimes one must carry more than the other for a bit of time and vice versa. The point here is that in the end it evens out. When one person is continually carrying the bulk of the work of a relationship it puts things out of balance and sends the wrong message to the other person. Compromise and honesty are two other important frameworks that build a g

The shawl I'm making for the women of Afghan is moving along too slowly to be completed by the deadline. I have worked long and hard on it and it is not going to happen. Today I was hit by a sudden inspiration when looking at a knitting book with designs using chunky wool and big needles. There was a wrap in there that measures the same size as the afghan I need to make and the best part is that the project is that the completion time on it is supposedly ten hours. Because it's me doing the knitting I might have to say it will take me 20 hours but still within easy reach of the July deadline. The new yarn is quite beautiful with several shades of pink and purple which I doubt I can capture in a picture but I will try! As for the "other" shawl, I have a soon to be 97 year old grandmother who would enjoy having something so warm and light around her shoulders so all is not lost. I can't help but draw parallels between this knitting project and relationships. The bi

When asked to do readings for people I would have to say that the vast majority of the questions are on relationship concerns. One of the most frequently asked questions are about the soul mate connection. The soul mate connection is a wonderful connection yet it most often a difficult one, at least in the beginning. It amuses me when I see advertisements about finding your “soul mate”. The ads make it appear as if this is the fairy tale match of your lifetime “The perfect man/woman to meet your every romantic desire”. Is there really such a thing? Well, I’d have to say yes and no. A soul mate relationship is a very special connection unlike any other. What characterizes a soul mate relationship? How do you know you are in one? Here are a few clues: Do you and this other person often have a “mind meld” where you are both thinking the same thing at the same time? Do you find that you have so much in common with each other? The more you get to know them, the scarier it becomes in how t

Superman used to go to what was called his fortress of solitude when he needed to figure things out. It was a place where he could have a time out from the world around him and think about some solutions to various problems facing him. In relationships there are times when people need a time out. It could be to think about the relationship or it could be something entirely different. The important thing is that if a person needs a time out it should be respected. I would go so far as to say that no explanation is required as to why it's needed. The other person would need to trust and respect the decision. The most important component of this and how it relates to effective communication in a relationship of any kind, is for the actual words to be spoken. Those four simple words "I need time out." Simple, yet says it all and forestalls any possible miscommunication of intent and therefore will save a lot of grief and anxiety on all sides. Without the actual words spoken t